Completely Unoriginal

1. The first TV show I can remember avidly, diligently watching as a child was Deputy Dawg. So obsessed was I with this character that I absconded with one of my grandfather’s fedoras and wore it around, refering to it as my Deputy Dawg Hat. Years later, I caught some Deputy Dawg cartoons on late night television, and was amazed at how borderly-offensive the thick Southern accents and broad yokel comic strokes were. But it occured to me that the reason I liked it so much as a kid in South Carolina was because everyone else I knew in real life talked that way too. Later, when we moved to New Jersey, I became a Speed Racer fan, a much more urban/northern sort of cartoon obsession. The Japanese manga/anime fad and ill-conceived Wachowsky Brother movie seems to have kept Speed (the first Japanese animated series to run in the States, I believe) in the public eye a lot more than poor Deputy Dawg over the years. Somehow I don’t imagine Deputy Dawg gettting an official, slick flash website anytime soon. Other favorites from the ’60s and early ’70s: Underdog, Wacky Races, Hillbilly Bears (I don’t think I realized they had funny accents either), and Quickdraw McGraw (but only the El Kabong episodes). Towards the end of my regular cartoon watching days, I also liked The Groovy Goolies and Hair Bear. I think kids today would find any and all of these cartoons to be woefully inadequate, spoiled as they are by CGI and digital animation, and by 24/7 opportunities to watch cartoons. But, man, in the ’60s and early ’70s, Saturday morning cartoons were the bomb, and your afternoon play couldn’t officially start until you’d caught up on what Speed Racer was up to that day, so that way you’d have something to talk about while throwing rocks at each other. The only peril to Saturday mornings was when you work up too early, because then your parents would make you watch Davey and Goliath until the real cartoons came on. And the last thing you wanted to start a Saturday with was something wholesome (yuck!) with a message (blech!). It was better to just stay in bed and dream about setting your model airplanes on fire.

2. Is it just me, or does Prince of Persia:The Sands of Time look like it might just be the worst and stupidest movie ever made? I mean, who is the target audience for this? Has anyone seen it? Does anyone want to? I have an actual physical repulsion reaction every time I see an advertisement for it, so am hoping it disappears into the bargain DVD bin really, really soon, since I don’t shop there.

3. Wow, there’s now a website celebrating mutants like me! Though, uh, it’s kind of creepy and makes me uncomfortable. I think I’ll just back to squinting and furrowing my brow so nobody can see my green eyes in the first place. Nobody here but us Neanderthals. Move along, folks. Nothing to see here.

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